Mr. Perfect... No Such thing...
Posted by ablack on May. 19, 2015 / Subscribe 0
Leadership. What exactly are the elusive qualities that make a perfect leader? And is there a set formula? I’ve sat through tons of classes and presentations on this particular topic, and the theme is always the same. Treat people with respect, project an unwavering passion, and empower your team to carry out your vision. But what if all your best efforts in the leadership department aren’t making the dent that you thought they should? Does that mean that you’re not cut out to be a leader? Or perhaps worse yet, that you’re a bad leader? Hmmm…
I remember my first boss in A/E/C. She was well respected in the industry and quite direct in her approach…she just expected you to do your job, no more and no less. The environment in which I was groomed was very much like this: don’t try to make small talk about the weekend, never ask for a raise because you did your job, and avoid making excuses for missing a deadline. I never interpreted her as “mean” in her approach; it seemed to me that she had a fierce passion to succeed and wanted to push me to be my absolute best. And I thrived in this environment. She was an awesome role model in my eyes… exactly what I needed to kick-start my first real job, not to mention my career.
Fast forward ten years and I had found myself in my first “management” role, very much emulating my first boss’ “no-nonsense” leadership style. After all, it had worked for me! But my marketing coordinator had just resigned and the exit interview didn’t cast me in the best light. To sum it up, I needed to be less abrasive, more caring, and give more kudos…otherwise I was going to get a reputation in the industry as being an unreasonable person to work for.
I was shocked. I thought everything had been going so well. A deadline had never been missed, we had been updating marketing collateral that hadn’t been touched in years…virtually all of the goals of the department were being met. But apparently I was missing a “touchy-feely” component to my management approach. In all honesty, I didn’t know that was a requirement of the position. In fact, I was quite perplexed. How could the same approach that had worked so well for me almost a decade ago be yielding such different results?
I nearly quit over this “bad review.” I couldn’t help but think that I was beyond help…maybe even beyond hope. Ithought I was doing all the “right” things as a manager. I thought that I was doing all the things that would position me as a mentor to an industry newcomer and solidify my position as a leader within the firm. But I had clearly failed at both. I was feeling as low as I had ever felt, both doubting myself and doubting my future within A/E/C.
I needed help… I needed an epiphany…I needed a shrink…hell, I needed a drink! And that’s when both fate and fortune stepped in, because that’s when I happened to run into one of my long-time trusted mentors. She took me to happy hour (of course) and after listening to my story, she gently reminded me of one simple fact: there is no such thing as a “perfect” leader. She was also quick to remind me that there are as many leadership styles on this planet as there are people on this planet! These words of wisdom were just the boost that I needed to pull myself up out of the doldrums…and it wasn’t long before I got my “groove” back.
Add another four years onto this equation and I am still in hot pursuit of my unique leadership style. But the one key difference now is that I stopped focusing on being a “perfect” leader. There is just no such thing. And I was reminded of this once again when I attended the SMPS President’s Leadership Symposium (PLS) last year and was shown a TED Talk by Drew Dudley called Everyday Leadership.
In the video, Drew makes the point that too often people are afraid to step up into a leadership role, or even put themselves into the category of “leader,” because it seems so far out of reach. We make leadership about changing the world...something that is no small feat. But the reality is that there is no world; there are only seven billion views of it. And if you change just one of those viewpoints, then you’ve actually made a difference as a leader. Powerful stuff, huh?
In fact, this idea struck such a chord within me that I decided it would be the basis for my entire tenure as Chapter President. SMPS Arizona’s 2014/15 year would be dedicated to growing leaders through “Lollipop Moments” (watch the video and you’ll get it). And now that I’ve got four years of management under my belt, am nine months into my SMPS Presidency, and just got over the hump of submitting for the Chapter’s “Striving for Excellence” award, this is what I’ve learned on my journey towards “Lollipop Leadership.”
- Tell people your expectations up front. If you expect people to work hard, never miss a deadline, and stay late to finish a project, then be clear in your expectations. Think of it as a verbal job description.
- Recognize your weaknesses and work on them one at a time. I firmly believe that in order for something to become part of your “DNA,” you must continuously practice that "something." My weakness as a leader? I tend to focus on what’s next instead of stepping back and celebrating what has been accomplished. I forget to give kudos when someone has done a fantastic job...so that's what I have focused on THIS year.
- Get in touch with your emotions. I don’t mean this in a “crying at work” or “screaming at the top of your lungs” kind of way. I just mean that every experience comes saddled with some type of emotion. For instance, when I am stressed, I become extremely direct and I forget how this can come across to others. My “director” mode is entirely unintentional, but not unavoidable…as long as I am aware of it.
- Know when to apologize. If we could go back in time, there is always something that we would do differently, say differently, or approach differently. But since we are still waiting on the invention of the time machine, the only thing we can do is learn from our mistakes and say “sorry.”
- Last but certainly not least, just be YOURSELF. I openly admit that 99% of the time, I am being 100% ME. I’m direct, I’m stubborn and I can be a little bit bossy. And I am nothing like a lot of other leaders out there. But if I remind myself that there is no such thing as a “perfect” leader, then I am better able to embrace my unique valueas a leader…especially when someone is chiding my weaknesses as one.
So what if you’re not a leader? Well I say that’s just absurd. Each one of us is capable of leadership in our own way; we are all “lollipop leaders!” And the beauty of this is that you don’t need a specific title to be seen as a leader, nor are you required to manage a staff or even achieve a certain number of years in the industry to be considered one. All you need is the passion to make a difference and the drive to encourage others to do the same.
Oh…and one more thing. If you ever catch me on one of those days when I’m in “director” mode, I apologize in advance. That's next year's focus LOL!
About the Blogger: When not serving as President of SMPS Arizona or developing a strategy to win the next project for Concord, Grenee Celuch, CPSM can usually be found having her patience and her stubbornness put to the test by her German Shepherd. After countless years and hours of manipulation, she finally realized 5% of dog training is for the dog and 95% for the human. She credits her dogs with teaching her that you should jump for joy when excited, that snuggling and wet kisses can cancel out even the crappiest of days, and that stopping to smell the roses from time to time is not without its merits.
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